Keeping Connected
Recently I posted about disconnecting to connect, but how do you get back into the game of connecting when you are so used to looking at a screen instead of looking a friend in the eyes?
In today's society, everything is go, go, go. It is not out of the ordinary to mutter or hear the words, "I wish we could hang out but I am just too busy". I may have quoted an old high school buddy in a past post, to be completely honest I can't remember at this point, so I'll just say it again "If you wanted to do it, you would. Simple." The truth is, we can continue to make these excuses to not see friends and family all we want but at the end of the day, we have to force ourselves to make excuses to make time for them instead.
I have one amazing friendship that comes to mind. This woman and I are both accustomed to working multiple jobs that take up a lot of time in our week, admittedly her more so than I these days. It is very seldom that our schedules ever match up for a day off, even less likely that we won't have a lot of chores and errands to catch up on that day. So how do we make time for each other? We make sure that one of the likely errands we will need to run is done side by side; we go grocery shopping together. Sure, it may not be the same as going out dancing or enjoying a girls night in but it does allow us an hour to catch up and update each other on our lives and it gives us the opportunity to make an excuse to have lunch together as well, I mean, we're already together anyway and a girls gotta eat.
I've also posted in the past about maintaining long distance friendships. This sometimes does requires us to connect but there are different ways of going about it to make it more personal. Lately, my long distance best friend and I have both found ourselves busy in life. We don't have as much time as we did in the past to Netflix together so instead, every now and again we message each other simply saying that we miss each other and "Skype tomorrow?". The great thing about Skype is that like the above scenario, a lot of the times it can be done while doing chores as well. Last week for example, my friend and I both set up our laptops in the kitchen after work and caught up for an hour as we cooked our dinners. It allowed us time to see each other, laugh together, and feel connected despite the many demanding distractions life often has to offer.
One of the biggest factors of success in this is setting an actual date. With my best friend over Skype, it is important that we do not say “Skype soon” because we all know how often that works out in a busy life. By saying tomorrow, we are accepting a commitment to each other, a commitment to make it happen.
Additionally, that particular Skype date I am referencing held the bonus surprise of my friend informing me that she has just gotten herself a new car and wanted to take a road trip to see yours truly. Another plus side? Her roommate whom I also know from college has also committed to coming that weekend. Better yet? That happens to be the weekend after Deadpool comes to theatres. So, making the time for what was meant to be a simple Skype date turned into a spur of the moment plan for a weekend visit and an absolutely amazind movie date all because of “Miss you, Skype tomorrow?”
The same goes with setting time for groceries with my other friend, if we don't settle on something then the next thing you know, one of us suddenly needs something and a convenient moment arises for us to go get the groceries done leaving the plan of sharing that time unfulfilled. Next thing you know, months have gone by without seeing each other because "I wish we could hang out but I am just too busy".
The key is making a conscious decision to hang out with someone. Who have you not seen in a while and wish you had more time for? How can you make something work? Do you have similar errands you can run together? Or perhaps the same lunch hour? Can you spare a half hour coffee run in the evening?
I have one amazing friendship that comes to mind. This woman and I are both accustomed to working multiple jobs that take up a lot of time in our week, admittedly her more so than I these days. It is very seldom that our schedules ever match up for a day off, even less likely that we won't have a lot of chores and errands to catch up on that day. So how do we make time for each other? We make sure that one of the likely errands we will need to run is done side by side; we go grocery shopping together. Sure, it may not be the same as going out dancing or enjoying a girls night in but it does allow us an hour to catch up and update each other on our lives and it gives us the opportunity to make an excuse to have lunch together as well, I mean, we're already together anyway and a girls gotta eat.
I've also posted in the past about maintaining long distance friendships. This sometimes does requires us to connect but there are different ways of going about it to make it more personal. Lately, my long distance best friend and I have both found ourselves busy in life. We don't have as much time as we did in the past to Netflix together so instead, every now and again we message each other simply saying that we miss each other and "Skype tomorrow?". The great thing about Skype is that like the above scenario, a lot of the times it can be done while doing chores as well. Last week for example, my friend and I both set up our laptops in the kitchen after work and caught up for an hour as we cooked our dinners. It allowed us time to see each other, laugh together, and feel connected despite the many demanding distractions life often has to offer.
One of the biggest factors of success in this is setting an actual date. With my best friend over Skype, it is important that we do not say “Skype soon” because we all know how often that works out in a busy life. By saying tomorrow, we are accepting a commitment to each other, a commitment to make it happen.
Additionally, that particular Skype date I am referencing held the bonus surprise of my friend informing me that she has just gotten herself a new car and wanted to take a road trip to see yours truly. Another plus side? Her roommate whom I also know from college has also committed to coming that weekend. Better yet? That happens to be the weekend after Deadpool comes to theatres. So, making the time for what was meant to be a simple Skype date turned into a spur of the moment plan for a weekend visit and an absolutely amazind movie date all because of “Miss you, Skype tomorrow?”
The same goes with setting time for groceries with my other friend, if we don't settle on something then the next thing you know, one of us suddenly needs something and a convenient moment arises for us to go get the groceries done leaving the plan of sharing that time unfulfilled. Next thing you know, months have gone by without seeing each other because "I wish we could hang out but I am just too busy".
The key is making a conscious decision to hang out with someone. Who have you not seen in a while and wish you had more time for? How can you make something work? Do you have similar errands you can run together? Or perhaps the same lunch hour? Can you spare a half hour coffee run in the evening?
Where there is a will, there is a way, you just have to put forth the effort of making it happen. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to compare schedules with a certain artistic friend (who created a certain TBSR logo) to make sure we hang out soon for a paint session or perhaps some sushi.
Cheers!
The Bra Street Rambler
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